A Rob Meme

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Yes, it's the Twi-meme seen 'round the world. The Twiworld, that it. You know - the only world that really matters, natch. What I wouldn't give to snag that bad boy (and the photo) to put in here but no luck so far.

I went to see Eclipse so long ago that reviewing it here is pointless. I let my sorry little excuse for a blog all on its lonesome for a loooooong time. The DVDs should be coming out soon. When? I can't remember right now. I will probably go with the Target version again. Or maybe I'll go whole hog and get both the Target and the Wal-mart versions. It depends on how hard the impulse-buy bug is biting me on the ass the first day they are available.

Sure, it has nothing to do with Twilight, but the new Harry Potter movie opens on Friday!! I didn't see the last one in the theatre (lazy ass fan that I am) so can't wait to see this one. I am in awe of how well-done the movies are! It will be so sad when there aren't any more of them!! She has GOT to write some James, Lily, and Sirius books (hope, hope, hope).

Many days late..

...and I'm finally going to see Eclipse at the theatre with my bestie. Why have I not seen it yet after practically foaming at the mouth during the countdown on my widget? RL got in the way pretty much the whole fucking month so far. Extensive dental work, sucky times at job (mostly due to my various problems rather than the job, to be fair), and just plain old fucking laziness! I have to remember to have the PEs ready to go - don't want them to miss out!! Because I'm a major bitch, I will probably bitch about stuff but from everything I've read/seen so far (on much better blogs than this one), is mostly positive.

My concerns: Is KStew gonna mumble, blink, or stutter excessively (hopefully less excessively than Twilight, I hope)? Will I be able to look past Robward's shiteous sideburns to enjoy his acting...and other stuff? Will Jacksper's wig make me want to hurl? Will the newborns be scary or just a large pack of dorks? Will Bryce's atrocious wig detract from her performance as much as I think it will (she is NOT Victoria, of course - Rachelle is)? Will Carlisle's strange accent distract me from his terrible wardrobe and smokin' hot looks?

All these questions will be answered soon...if/when I remember to blog. Such a luxury. If I had one of those famous Twilight blogs, I'd actually have to write something at least remotely entertaining every day. However, lots of other people do that so I don't have to. Thank goodness!

Having Fun with Blogger Templates

Gee - more ways to mess up how this ridiculous blog looks! Hope it isn't too terrible (but it really is). Now if I could just figure out how to shrink the banner...

I heard that Rob was great on Leno the other night. I always forget to check the Lexicon to see when/where he is going to be on TV. I am such a lazy fan! However, I do have a couple of new widgets -->. Enjoy.

It's Time (or about time) for Rob Interviews!

Yay Eclipse for only being however many days away that my widget says it is! Let the Rob interviews commence! I hope they're more fun than the New Moon ones were. I hope he's just as adorkable as he was during the Twilight interviews. I don't envy his life at all - filming, interviews, nutjob fans...oh wait. I'm a fan but not one of those batshit crazy ones that waits to ambush him at talk show entrances. Certainly not like that broad (I can call her a broad because she went from fan to nutso in 0.05 seconds when he was filming Remember Me. We all know who I mean!). I envy the bitch for touching the precious but have to shake my head in disgust over her behavior. If only he would ambush me that way. I wouldn't mind at all although the shock would probably kill me. What a way to die!!

Bad Blogger!

Yes, I am a bad blogger! Too overwhelmed with RL to write anything interesting, I guess. Okay, so who else thinks that WFE Rob is the hottness? I saw one photo of him just sitting in the grass that was such a nice one. He looked happy and at peace. Goodness knows, he could use a break!

C'mon June 30th!! A friend and I are going to a marathon where we get to watch all three movies in a row! Can't wait!! Will do my best to ignore the mumbling, blinking, and stuttering in Twilight. Will do my best to ignore Edward's grandpa clothes in New Moon. Hope I don't have to ignore anything in Eclipse (yeah, right) although I am sure there will be at least five or so heinous moments (like why don't the Newborns swim already?) that I will have to turn a blind eye to. Of course Pocket Edward will be going with us - maybe both of them (regular and sparkly). Pocket Edward #1 hasn't been anywhere in ages and Sparkly Pocket Edward hasn't been anywhere at all. Don't be surprised if they pick fights with other Pocket Edwards (or just with each other) while we're out!!

Rob's Heinous Outfit and My Thoughts About It

Okay, Rob, what the fuck was up with those frightenly-awful khaki disaster pants that day? Did you let KStew dress you to keep us whores away? They are so wrong in so many ways! You, of course, don't need to dress for your fans. We'd fantasize about jumping you no matter what you did (or didn't) wear. My ultimate fear: that you'll wear those heinous pants with the equally heinous puffy brown jacket. Ack! Didn't need that visual! Where's the brain bleach for that horrible visual. Ew, just ew! I know you don't read this crap so I hope no one else gives you the idea to put that hellish outfit together. While I don't like the Adidas you insist on wearing, at least they aren't those shiteous Nikes!!!

Poor Rob. He can't even have a wardrobe malfunction without massive analysis online (have a look at Letters to Rob - totally hilar)! as to WTF he wore what he did. I like the haircut, though. It must be relief for him to get rid of the shaggy mess he was sporting in Bel Ami. Anyway, that heinous outfit would look best of all on the floor. In my bedroom.

Rob's Birthday

Today is Rob's birthday. Women everywhere can now feel just a little better about lusting after a 24-year-old than slobbering over a 23-year-old. We will just look the other way about our own approaching birthdays!

The new Eclipse footage looks promising except that Edward wouldn't let Jake get to him, at least not visibly, like in that scene with Charlie. More Charlie = good! I don't feel so creeptastic about leering at him! I'm skipping through Eclipse just to, uh, refresh my memory. I should have that book about memorized now. It's my favorite so I've read it the most times. How many times? I have fucking lost count.

Those Damned Fanfics again, Daytime TV, and the Scifi Channel

I decided to count how many of the fuckers I'm reading. I've started reading over 35 of them with being several chapters into about 20 of them. Good thing my desk chair is comfortable - I hardly leave my desk at all some days. Especially on days when I read fanfic to scrub the scum from work out of my head. It really isn't a scummy job - it just can be extremely mentally tiring some days.

I haven't found out yet what was said on Oprah today - just waiting for someone else to summarize it so I can read what they said. I am counting on Letters to Rob for the deets tomorrow morning. I refuse to watch her show - I strongly suspect it causes brain damage in many cases.

Daytime TV is kind of like another universe, especially the network channels. Except on weekends, I mostly default to Syfy. The weekend movies suck, though. There was a movie on Syfy a few weeks ago called "Mega-Piranha." I watched it just to see how bad it was and just about laughed my ass off! It would have been less funny if the hilarity would have been on purpose. Classic shot? Giant piranha leaping out of the ocean and snagging a helicopter. Let me tell you, it just doesn't get any funnier than that!! The special effects were just as atrocious as the acting was. Win-win!

Fanfics again

It just keeps getting worse! I'm finally paying to recommendations and finding that most of the recommends are just awesome! I looked at the clock and realized that I have spent over 2 1/2 hours on that shit. Except that it isn't shit! What a bunch of creative and talented writers there are out there!

Back to Breaking Dawn. For some reason, once I get to the part where they realize the Volturi are coming (twss), I stop reading and move on to something else or just go back to Twilight. New Moon, while I really like it, is very hard for me to read. I can feel Bella's pain so clearly. That book always makes me cry - a lot.

Back to Windows 7: I have decided that it has some super-cool attributes so I may not hate it anymore. I may upgrade my computer with it someday. Too bad it costs so much!!! I need to take some classes, too, to learn more about it & MS office 07 (and the upcoming office 10). I always have plans and ideas; now just to get off my ass and implement them!

Windows 7 - again

What does Windows 7 have to do with Twilight? Not a damned thing! However, I have decided that 7 does have some features that are better than Vista and XP. The Windows exploder isn't as good, IMO.

Well, I'd best get back to the crap pile that is my living room and continue to try to make some order out of the chaos! It will sure be great to not want to throw a tantrum every time I have to move eight things to get to the one thing I want (the one thing, in this case, is not Rob). Since I can't hang anything on the walls with nails (plaster walls and nervous homeowners), I'm going to have to use the walls over my desk as bulletin boards. Just stick the crap right up on the walls. It'll be a PitA but eventually worth it, especially once I get a decent desk in here. Needless to say, my office area is also my Rob area. Since I am stuck in this corner, several hours a day, why not have great scenery? I caved and got an Eclipse Edward poster. So sue me. My family thinks I have lost my fucking mind.

Fanfic is eating my life

I used to laugh about the fanfic whores out there. I scoffed and thought, "That will never happen to me." Shit. Now I'm reading 10 of the damned things and checking them daily for updates even though I get update notices. This is really cutting into my reading-actual-books time. I'm glad that there are plenty of good ones without smut (or very little smut) in them. Just not much into lemons when I read any kind of fiction. Besides, lemons aren't in the original spirit of the books! Just sayin'.

Just finished reading Eclipse again. I love the conversation Bella has with her mother in the first chapter of Breaking Dawn. Even though I'd rather Stephenie finish Midnight Sun, I am looking forward to the story about Bree. Even though she has such a small part to play, I always wondered about her. How it really was for her as a Newborn. Maybe writing about Bree has put her in the mood to finish Midnight Sun? We can only hope.

I just looked up at my Rob calendar. Time to switch from the March sex stare to April. I will miss the sex stare. Doesn't matter, though. I have a fuckton of sex stare photos on my hard drive. Better ones than on the calendar! Maybe I should print out some of those photos. I think the sex stare should be easily visible at all times - even when the computer is shut off.

Have DVD and Still Haven't Watched It

Yep, I've had the DVD since Saturday and I STILL haven't watched it. I get the film cell out every once in awhile and look at it though. Eclipse Edward is fiiiiiine!! He doesn't look like Grandpa Edward - yay! Just started rereading Eclipse today. It's my favorite of the 4 books. Bella is kind of a wuss - why on earth worry about the Cullens and the wolves? I had great faith in them. Oh well. I'm a real person and Bella isn't; plus I'm not 18 either and that probably makes a biiiiig difference!

The DVD - like anything else is going on

I scored my 3-disc deluxe set at Target on Saturday (only a couple of those left!). Have I watched it yet? NO. I don't have my DVD player set up yet (mainly because I can't find it) due my cluster-fuck of a move in January. That's right. January. But it came with a cell with Edward in it! Yay! I can look at that cell whilst thinking of the movie and the extra 2 discs of various stuff I'm not watching right now. Instead of looking for the DVD player, I'm blogging. Much more productive, no?

So what's up with that photo of Rob in Bel Ami? And that questionable area we're all wondering about? We all wanna know, Rob.

Rereading parts of New Moon to get ready for watching the movie again. I must bow my head in shame - I only saw it once in the theater. Bad fan! Bad fan! Have already made plans for Eclipse. My friend and I and PE are defs going the day after it opens. Just too damned old anymore to do midnight showings! Maybe I can get a group of us to go - I finally have more than one friend who is a Twifan! Ya know how it is out here in the middle of nowhere...mostly tweens, not grown-ups. Bleah. Boring.

Windows 7 SUCKS

Yes, it does what your vacuum cleaner does. And very aggressively! Even the earth's gravity does not suck as much as Windows 7. Suckity Suckity Sucks!! I'm helping my mother get files off her old XP machine on to the new 7 machine. The Windows Exploder is almost completely useless. I've used the fucking exploder since Windows 95 and it never failed me until now. I am somehow reminded of Windows Me - it's nothing but a lame-ass fucking virus, not an O/S. And people think Vista sucks!! Give me Win 2000 over that fucking piece of shit!

Now, on to Twi-stuff. I am suffering from indecision about New Moon: Target? Wally World? Borders? Decisions, decisions. I'm too old (and disinterested) to go to a release party so I'll just have to hope for the (yawn) best. I'm leaning towards Target because everyone knows that the 7-minute excerpt from Eclipse will be leaked so why buy it at Wally World? As of right now, I'm planning on the Target version. More stuff for my money! Chris, you'd better do some good commentary! Twihards all over the world depend on you, Mr DILF. If anyone was reading this sorry-ass piece of the blogiverse, I'd ask you to comment with your choice. Since it's only me, me, and me here, never mind!

Remember Me...some other time

Nope, I'm not going to see it. I read the comments on Twitarded's comment section about it and decided that it was best if I don't go. The ending is fuckall sad. I don't like to go to movies that have sad endings - too depressing. And since I am depressed a lot of the time anyway, I don't need that particular type of help. Give me Twilight or sci-fi movies any day. Let's just say that I love the Lethal Weapon movies, Independence Day, and Armageddon. Lots of property destruction. A little sad here and there but mostly lots of car chases, UFOs, and destructive meteors. What's not to like?

That Eclipse trailer...very uneven, methinks. That shot of Victoria jumping over the river was great up until the close-up of her face. Bad wig and she looked startled. At least Robward isn't dressed like his own grandfather anymore! Much better fit, since he is pretending to be 17. He looks fuckhawt (of course, when does he not look fuckhawt?).

THE Trailer

If you haven't watched this yet, you have GOT to!! Looks like Scummit is doing well so far. If they fuck up this movie, there will be a mass revolt!! C'mon, leg hitch!!

Blinking and Stuttering and Lip-biting...

...oh my! This shit is really getting on my nerves! For some reason, I thought I needed to watch Twilight yet again today and I think I reached my overload point. I don't know what's worse - watching her or listening to her! I am looking forward to New Moon as much to block out the images and sounds of poor ol' KStew in Twilight as anything. I hadn't watched the movie all that much before I got stuck with my recent DVR recordings for entertainment but now I think I'm gonna have to erase that sucker!

I'm still almost finished with Breaking Dawn...again. I think I'll do what I usually do and bail until I decide to read Twilight again. What else to read? Now working on The Walker Papers books by C. E. Murphy and "The Fresco" by Sheri S. Tepper. Gotta take a break from Twilight sometimes!

Commando Watch

This is interesting: slobbering and drooling over the Precious is not enough - now we've got to know if he's wearing manties or not?! Do we really want to know? Of fucking course!! It amazes me that with the amount of press coverage Rob gets that we don't know such basic details already! We've seen him party, get staggering drunk, hide out with Mulletsten, and hang out by dumpsters but there really is very little real information about him! At least we know he shops for his manties at M&S. I guess that's something.

I found a great blog with lots of reading to tide us over during the time we're waiting for RM, the NM DVD release, and Eclipse: Bewitched Bookworms! Lots of great recommendations there for reading material. Head on over there, fellow supernatural YA fiction fans (and everyone else)!

It must be said

It must be said: Rob's BAFTA hair was a freaking disaster. Clearly his stylist was looking the other way when the hair happened and when s/he saw it, it was too late to fix it! But we did get to see a few sex stares and a laugh or two so all was not lost. I am going to cut him a break this time because he probably has to have his hair long for Bel Ami.

I am nearly finished with Breaking Dawn for the gazillionth time. I wade through the lame parts to get to the parts I like. Jacob's POV is great, IMO. The imprint thing is pretty creepy, even though Renesmee isn't a normal child. Ick. I don't mind her name though.

Details, Details

Could this day be any less interesting? No new trash-talk about Rob to gossip about. That Details shoot was, well, kinda boring. I'm glad that he mentioned that he had a hangover - it explains a lot. I guess men (except for hungover Rob) like that model taco stuff. Srsly.

Here are some of my many questions:
Who wants to look at anyone's privates for 12 hours?
And who the hell picked those wacked-out shoes from the bizarre bearskin photos?
Wassup with the model in the tub where Rob has his hand in the water? And who wants to touch other people's bath water anyway??
Who picked out the clothes - some of the stuff was good and some of it was kinda like they gave Rob some say in the wardrobe like in New Moon.

Some of the photos are good but I'm not buying the magazine. I have no interest in seeing model tacos in various bizarre positions.

New Banner!!!

Wowzers! Watch Rob make his amazing Vanity Fair kung-fu moves! Thanks so much to Jeanette at Robmusement for the above wonderfulness!!! Thankfully, we don't have to see what happened when he landed. I wish wish wish I had turned fangirl earlier - then I would have gotten that issue and the GQ that has SadRob in it. What does this all have to do with Twilight? Not much. I'm rereading Breaking Dawn...again. One part I like, and it's gushy, is where Bella feels like she is finally as she was meant to be - a vampire. I've even gotten used to Renesmee's goofy-ass name (except, like Bella, I don't like the nickname "Nessie").

That David Slade is so stingy with the Eclipse teasers! Bad, bad man! There are zillions of fangirls just panting to see them (I'm not panting but I want to see them!).

I did watch the video somewhere (I think it was either Twicrack Addict or Robsessed) that says there are some cool new action figures being released after the New Moon DVD is released. There's even gonna be a SparkleEdward! If only they could make the action figure actually look like Edward from the end of New Moon (minus the heinous wardrobe)! I keep starting to buy Guidoward but he's just too awful.

PE is still standing on my bedside table. He watches me while I sleep.

Oh, Hell

I'm assuming we've all seen that train-wreck photo of BeardRob. It's just wrong, Rob. Srsly. Wrong. And Kellan in his CK unnawares!! Whoa - almost makes up for BeardRob! Kellan has absolutely no shame - thank God. Now why can't we get some of those kind of photos of Rob? Certainly Rob probly doesn't have muscles in amazing places like Kellan does, but Rob has the happy trail! I love me some happy trail. But for today, I'm stealing this photo from Robmusement's most recent tweet:

Truly a Desert (Not Dessert - Except for the Wallpapers)

And what a dry, empty desert it is! Worse than Yuma, AZ in August (I oughta know - I lived there back in the dark ages)! At least there are some yummy wallpapers and the new EW outtakes to help tide us over. NinjaRob is pretty funny, especially considering how he probably landed. Not nice to say but it is kinda endearing that he is not the most nimble person. And then there is the photo that looks like he got a whiff of his own 'pits. Whew! Hope not!

We have Remember Me and the release of the New Moon DVD to look forward to. This time I'm gonna splurge and get the Target 3-disk set - something I swore I'd never do for a Twilight movie! The extras have been worth the extra money whenever I've gotten the DVDs with them (like Fellowship of the Ring).

Fanfic - Who Knew?

I can finally see why people get hooked on fanfic! Now that I've found some that aren't so, um, lemon-y, I am really liking it. I'm reading Eye Contact by silver sniper of night and so far, so good! I hope it has a happy ending. I love happy endings -- if I didn't, I wouldn't be such a major Twilight fan! The prologue is a little ominous. Anyway, it's a good read so far. Thanks for the rec, itsjustme!

We've got to give up ... for now, anyway

Yes, it's true. Robsten is a reality, not just a bad dream. It isn't as if we didn't all know it but we didn't really want to know it. The photos of each of them with the little girl are sweet (you will never, ever hear me say or type that expression again in my life). KStew looked good in her photo (no fair! no fair!). Rob looked like he needs lots more vacation time...and a new razor or three. Yikes! The publicity tours were probably extremely hard on (that's what she said) him. Maybe he and Kristen can find a thrift store - one that does NOT sell plaid!! We can always hope!

So here's today's consolation prize: